I began studying all I could about the process of transitioning, and the requirements that would be necessary to fulfill to enable that to happen. I was fearful that there would be some quirk in the process that would prevent me from being a qualified candidate for the surgical procedure, but I discovered that there was nothing in these requirements that I felt were beyond my reach, except for the cost. There was the cost of the surgery itself, but also the cost of the professional counseling; the hormones; and the time to accomplish this had to be considered. Basically I needed to be evaluated by a professional psychologist experienced in gender dysphoria; be recommended for Hormone Replacement Therapy; and live full time as a woman for a year in order to be accepted as a candidate for Gender Reassignment Surgery. The catch for me was that I was living in a state that did not offer a wealth of transsexual resources. I had to ask the people I had met where I might find these professionals. With their help I was able to get in touch with this care.
A year ago, I had fulfilled all of these requirements and had all of the documentation that I needed to gather together to apply for a surgery appointment as described by the stipulations of the surgeon that I had selected to perform my surgery, and sent them off. A month went by and I had not heard from the doctor, or his staff, so I called and asked if they had received my application, and if there was a problem with my documentation. I was told they needed my medical history before I could be offered a surgery date. I asked where I might get a copy of the required Medical History, and they told me that it was supposed to have been in the application package they sent me. I said that it was not, and asked if they would be able to fax me the form, so that I might fill it out and fax it back in order to save time. I waited a week before I called them again and asked if all of my documentation was in order, and was told that it was all there, and acceptable. I then asked if I could have a surgery date, and was expecting to hear that I would be assigned a date one year out from then, as I had been talking to several girls, asking how far in advance their date had been set. After hearing her turn pages of her appointment book for what seemed like hours I learned that the soonest they had available at that time was over two years out She explained that I could be placed on a move ahead list, and that if there were any cancellations, I could be moved forward. I said I’d accept that date, and at least I’m in line to have the surgery. I saw little chance of being moved ahead because who would ever even think of canceling their appointment.
Four months passed, and I did not hear from them, some girls mentioned that if I hadn’t sent them a deposit I would not have my date held. As I had not been asked to send a deposit, I became concerned that I was losing my date, so I called again and asked if I was still scheduled for my original date, and was told I was still set, I asked if they needed a deposit, and they said that since my surgery was still over 20 months away that they would wait until later to request a deposit, unless I just wanted to make a payment. Two months ago, I asked a girl that I knew had her surgery date scheduled after mine if she had called the doctor about getting her deposit back, as she had elected to have her surgery elsewhere rather than wait so long. When I saw her last, she was crowing that she was given a new date, and that was now 8 months sooner than mine. I asked her how in heck she did that, and she replied that she asked if they had any cancellations, and she got that date. I called the doctor immediately, and asked why they never let me pay them any money, and by the way did they have any cancellations that I could move up to. I was then offered a date seven months sooner, and I was quite pleased.
Another friend of mine heard my story and said that she wasn’t even assigned a date yet, but she had applied three months earlier. She asked if I would call the doctor and ask them if she could have surgery the same date as me, and we could go together as a group. I believed that was a hopeless task, but said I would, and lo and behold they agreed to do just that. A week later I thought to myself, I wonder if we could get a surgery date this year, as the cost of the surgery goes up yearly, and we’d save $1500.00. I called and asked if there were any openings for the two of us this year, and again, they were able to accommodate us, and so we are off, scheduled for surgery two months from my last call to them, three weeks from when you read this article.
If I hadn’t asked how to get started, or can I, or when, or where, or how, or who, I wouldn’t be leaving until next year. This journey has taught me many lessons, but the one that seems to be the strongest right now is “You don’t know anything until you ask.”
Thanks for listening.
Allison
